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HEALTHY ADULT FRIENDSHIPS

I don’t know if it’s in the universe, in the air, or it’s only 30 years old, but my life and, basically, everyone’s life seems to be going through some drastic changes in life. Whether it’s a career, a relationship or just a change of focus, nobody seems to be immune. It also reminds me of how important my friendship becomes as life changes. The 21st century is not a joke to maintain healthy friendships among adults. Keeping in touch with people is easier than ever. Even if he hasn’t talked for ten years, he knows the most recent life of a high school student roommate, but becoming a good friend is harder than ever. Our lives are shorter than ever. Moving, changing jobs and meeting new people is much easier than before, and these people have never interacted with them before. But leaving friendship is just as easy. Friendship is much shorter than ever, there are many applications to solve in this world, and there are few shortcuts to be a good friend in the world, and Instagram is not important.

I am not a perfect friend now. No one is. We are all stuck in our solar system and let us know that we don’t have enough time to serve ourselves these days. But that is my goal, to be a best friend and to be a fact, which makes me think of many practical implications. So today I want to talk about healthy friendships for adults and what it really means to show your friends.

Out of line
Internet has changed everything, for better or worse. The Internet is a great place to meet new people with like-minded ideas, but their friendship cannot live completely online. Believe me, I’ve been there. When I started with THM, it was exciting to meet like-minded people, but one of my biggest regrets was the close friendship that was ignored due to the excitement of my friendship on the Internet. Looking back now, 95% of the “friends” I make online are no longer in my life and, for those who have been, I am a terrible person. Healthy friendships between adults should go beyond the threshold online. No, they don’t have to face each other in person. I have friends all over the world, so this is not always possible, but when you look at the broad perspective of life, if most of your friendships are completely online, you may need to reevaluate your priorities.

Social relationships are really good for your health. Studies have shown that friendship can extend our lives and reduce the risk of heart disease. A good friendship can reduce our stress and release many neurochemicals, which improves our quality of life. Family and friends release more “feel good” chemicals (oxytocin, serotonin and dopamine) in the brain compared to online friendships. We are naturally social people, so each of us needs to feel that it belongs to others.

make it worth it
When it comes to priorities, how much do you really prioritize your friendship? One of my biggest understandings is that I really appreciate being a good friend, and I also appreciate those who feel the same. We often fall into the dilemma of productivity levels and often get rid of things on the task list, so much so that we don’t really take the time to assess whether we live in our values. A few days ago, C and I were playing a thanksgiving game (each of us listed 3 things we were grateful for), and I realized that in the changes of my life, I’m glad to be a good Friend of the people in my life. . This is not something I always value (or I realize that I value), but as I get older, it seems important. If you also value it, give it priority.

Quality, not quantity
Adult friendship is different from growing friendship, because we all have life! When you were in high school and college, it looked like you were surrounded by 1 million friends and it worked! Because your life = school and friends. When we get older, we have work, relationships, family, children, friends, personal time … and many more things that fit together. Rob Dunbar has researched adult relationships and says he can only have five true close friends. These are friends with whom you often spend time, know your daily situation and communicate with you in depth. The next circle I want to consider are “fun” friends. You go out with them, you have fun, you know them and you worry, but the relationship with people who know the depths of your soul is different. The circle of friends came out of there. The reality is that we all have so much time and energy and cannot give everyone in our lives everything. It’s okay I’d rather have five close friends than 25 peripheral friends. Reasonable?

It is appropriate?
If you have lived long enough, you may have experienced a relationship..

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